This is to announce that I have opened a new blog. A spot to store my teachings and ideas. Over here you will be able to search for specific subject matter eg. speech, activities, art, maths, writing......

However this blog do not have sufficient information as yet as I have only just started writing/uploading the ideas. Please continue to visit for new ideas and information. This blog serves as a teaching aide site and is not  a therapy or a counselling site. You are required to seek professional medical advice, therapy and Early Intervention help for complete and official diagnosis.

Enjoy the series :

Daily Antidote

I am glad to have started writing again. Better writing with a clearer and less chaotic mind. I hope in my next couple of coming posts I am able to throw in some knowledge which I have recently learned and discovered during my journey back to books!

Firstly I would like to share my personal opinion about seeking medical professions for diagnosis. As I stated previously and having more awareness of the importance of diagnosis, I think it's quite inevitable not to face the truth. However.........who we see will determine the fate of our child whether the professional sees it right or wrong. Therefore it's up to us using our own person judgement and knowledge to know what is right from wrong and reject what is not true. How? By doing your own personal research and reading helps, first and second never believe and rely on just one medical professional's opinion. After all you are your own best Dr!

Yes I am contradicting myself in away. One way I said it's inevitable and on the other hand I criticize on the way the entire diagnosis is being conducted in the local scene. I would agree if it was performed with adequate care and supervision. But to live on one person's opinion is like having your life at stack. What if he is wrong with the diagnosis? What if you went to see the wrong person? you life is instantly changed because of that one comment - `You son is Autistic' or `There is hope, let's try this'. Which is correct? Honest, I don't know....because that's exactly what I heard from the various psychos I brought my son to and  until now I am not convinced either diagnosis is accurate. Simply there is no IQ test performed. Simply it's only diagnosed by 1 man. And worse, it's based on a diagnosis performed 2-3 years ago, and you and I obviously know that is totally inaccuate with the inclusion of mental and physical development.

but what I expect is with the diagnosis comes with a package of self help ready for parents. Here I have yet met one who gave me that bit of assistance, instead I was the one who provided the information. So does this mean that crucial part of disseminating Early Intervention Programmes is not part of the job criteria? Then you tell me how a parent able to find help? From the sky? God whispers to our ears - and throws a book of EIP for us from heaven? Ha!

The heck about looking and searching for a cure if our mind is already set to say the child has NO HOPE because he is this and that. A total bullshit, rubbish.

I have proven to myself and many that sufficient help, does make a big difference. I am sure with my journey reading my posts you can see my obsession and determination not to give up. Yes I still grumble and complaint a lot but much lesser these days, right?

Yes it's nice to have a perfect child but.........................heck! I just got to face reality, just dreaming and hoping wouldn't' change the fact that we haven't reached this modern technology of reversing or even making our own home made biological baby! Who doesn't want a perfect child? With no problems in terms, mental and physical.....

Yes wouldn't it be great if I had a treasure chest to trade in for all the medical help and assistance. But I don't have that magical wand or power.

I am just an ordinary mother, human being put in a situation where I just have to find ways to make life a little easier to live with.

Have it ever occured to you why you are what you are today basing on the following myths and it's a universal aplication carried down from one generation to another? We haven't changed much in our parental upbringing and it's not surprising if we are not aware how important child attachment is?

Qoute:

• The first of these is the spoiling myth which says if you pick a baby up too much or respond to every need, you will spoil the child, making the child more demanding and moody. Attachment research demonstrates just the opposite: the baby whose needs are responded to consistently is actually less demanding and easier to care for. In the future this child is likely to be less fearful and more engaged with the world. Note that this is not to imply that children at later ages should be given all that they ask for. Limit-setting and adult guidance are critical as children mature. But children need to know that their needs are taken seriously, that they can actively seek and get a response from others, and that they are worthy of such care.

You must be wondering why I am talking about attachment. As I was doing some reading, it suddenly came to my realisation how significant it is to have an attachment to our children and it starts from the very first bonding we have with our newborns.

Enlist here is a link which explains very clearly about what I wish to share.

www.cyfc.umn.edu/policy/issues/Child-Adult_Attachment8-98.html

Qoute:

Without a secure attachment in infancy, children are significantly at risk for a wide range of poor outcomes, including difficulty in forming relationships, antisocial behavior, and a lack of the confidence, enthusiasm, and persistence that would facilitate success in school and work.

I didn't know how important infant attachment is until I read more about it and how it has significant influence to our adulthood personality make up. The fact that whether the baby feels securely attached or anxious avoidant/ambivalent attached has a big part in determining the child's behaviour as a toddler/preschooler and if the child has an avoidant behaviour (which is negative), it can be carried down to adulthood.

Does it not puzzle you why we have so much social hiccups these days? More violence, suicides or even sexuality disorientation?

And how about the present education method/system of disciplining children in school? I still hear nightmare stories of children being taken advantage off by teachers be it verbal or even physical abuse e.g being canned, slapped or even I have witnessed with my own eyes a student having to walk around the school block wearing a big banner stating something (in chinese and I can't read it but it obviously didn't look like an advertising banner in a school premises!).

I still remember the good old days as a convent girl we were punished having to stand infront of the stage if we talked during assembly time. We had to stand on the chair, followed with `promotion' if we continued to even whisper or chat in the classroom. Our names were called if we showed in sign of `disobendience' and shamed in front of our classmates.

It would appear after almost 2 decades, such discipline still exist if not even worse from the last I heard that a child was canned by the teacher because of so called disobedience. The best part the school principal denied and instead said that the child made up the story and that yes the principal and the disciplinary teacher has the right to cane the kids in school. And I thought that canning was banned in the education sector.

Think about it. 

I believe most of you would know that the Month of April is dedicated for the Awareness of Autism.

Doing my part as being a `victim'. lol. I have compiled a couple of info on Autism - simplified version/plagarism too! together with my photos. Since I love story telling I decided to take this opportunity to share Autism with a different group of people .

Link is: www.pbase.com/flowsnow/autism

I would like to reiterate again. Not only as a reminder but I would like to tell the whole world that we have to BELIEVE IN OUR CHILD.

Irrespective of whether the child is impaired or not, as parents we are the source of light to our children. They depend on us and their personality and future mainly derive from our molding and influence. As the saying goes what you sow is what you reap.

I brought my son for his bi-annual follow up with his shrink yesterday. Our main emphasis is his schooling and we were concern and wanted his input/views about schooling for White Horse. We have several options to adopt.

he suggested that I should consider putting WH to the government special ad class. Honestly I didn't expect him to say it but he sounded very passionate and confident about it.

He still `labels' him as Autistic. despite WH has shown signs of significance `recovery'/improvements. It would appear that he has already a mind set to label him Autistic and just because his verbal capacity is not at par as his age, he reckons he is in the mild to medium range. Medium range? Hello????? Am I hearing things? If he said he had mild Autistic traits, I can accept it. But to say he is medium???? How do you gauge/say that a child is this and that by a 10 minutes observation? Masturbating oneself doesn't mean it's Autistic related need ie. repetitive movements? So would you say that kids who masturbate themselves are also Autistic? And kids who are not good in speech are also a likely victim of being Autistic?

If that's the case, I would say a lot of us are also Autistic and just not diagnosed.

I don't deny or even discourage parents from labelling their kids. it's important to know what our kids are suffering from but I feel we should not live by a label given by a medical profession (and mind me only this person's opinion) forever. I feel a child has a capacity to change and become better. That's why we invest so much money on EIP for these children, hoping to bring them out of their world and live as normally as possible with us.

If we already have a mind set and reckon that our kid is Autistic and yes every behaviour is related to it.....than I might as well advice/say don't bother with EIPs. Save your money and buy yourself a beautiful car to drive. Don't waste your time educating your impaired children as there is no HOPE for them.  Keep them at home, chained with a leash and park them outside the house. Better build a little dog house for them to sleep in. Sever them left overs and don't bother to even keep the child. Terminate his life if you come to decide to even treat him like this. I think he is better dead then living an abused life.

After all they have the right also to have a `normal life'. They didn't choose to be what they are. They were just born like that. So is it fair that we should treat them any lesser than other normal human beings? that's my point.

As parents, we must believe in our child. If we don't, who will?

From what I see and hear with my eyes and ears, I have made up my mind that I cannot rely on our local support. I don't blame them for reacting the way they did. It's the mentality and awareness that's lacked. Mind me, it can occurs with medical professions to. Seeing a psychiatrist/psychologist, doesn't mean that the person can provide you a way to lighten your burden. In fact it can be the very opposite as when one have decided that there is `no hope' for children with impaired needs.

if it wasn't for the therapists believe in my son, coupled with my obsessive desire to make him better, he will not be able to read. I vow he can read The Fat Cat book by Fitzroy all by himself. His teacher showed me he could do simple additions on worksheets by himself. His writing is still laborious but at least he can hold a pencil properly and writing is not so bad like previously. So there......do you think I will ever want to give up on him? Do you think he is only good enough to mold clay to pots and draw postcards?

Yes I can try my best, give him the best as long as I can. I will continue to work with him academically to the point he can take...and leave the rest to destiny. I don't need to send him to a special needs class to learn vocational skills eg. clay molding, quilt making.

Yes it's our aim to make them independent. But what if our assumptions/diagnosis is wrong because we refuse to believe in the child's potential? What if he is not what you think he is......what if?

Can you live with that guilt for the rest of your life? Regretting that you didn't try your best to help him? But instead chose the easy way out to believe that the child cannot do it because he is `Autistic'.

No..I cannot accept it. NO I will not accept it. And no, I am not in self denial. Simply I believe in my son. I am his only HOPE.

Another article to share with you guys....

Worldupdates

Wednesday March 19, 2008 MYT 3:01:33 AM

Gene for brain connections linked with autism
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/3/19/worldupdates/2008-03-19t002917z_01_nootr_rtrmdnc_0_india-325646-1&sec=worldupdates

By Maggie Fox, Health and Science Editor

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - A gene that helps the brain make connections
may underlie a significant number of autism cases, researchers in the
United States reported on Tuesday.

Disruptions in the gene, called contactin 4, stop the gene from
working properly and appear to stop the brain from making proper
networks, the researchers reported in the Journal of Medical Genetics.

These disruptions, in which the child has either three copies of the
gene or just one copy when two copies is normal, could account for up
to 2.5 percent of autism cases, said Dr. Eli Hatchwell of Stony Brook
University Medical Center in New York, who led the study.

"That is a significant number," said Hatchwell.

"Generally the mistake that people make is they are looking for one
unifying cause for autism, and there is no such thing and there never
will be," Hatchwell said in a telephone interview.

He said his finding adds to the list of potential tests for autism,
and perhaps treatments for a range of conditions known as autism
spectrum disorders.

Hatchwell's team tested 92 patients from 81 families with autism
spectrum disorder and compared them to 560 people without autism.

They did a whole genome analysis, looking at the entire DNA map, and
e of the patients had deletions or duplications of DNA that
disrupted contactin 4.

They were all inherited from fathers without a history of autism,
which can cause severe social and developmental delays and even mental
retardation.

This may seem like a small number but millions of people have some
type of autism, Hatchwell noted. The U.S. Centers for Disease Control
and Prevention estimates that 1 in every 150 children has autism or a
related disorder such as Asperger's syndrome, which is marked by often
mild social awkwardness.

"Autism is a syndrome. These individuals have all been grouped
together as having the same thing. There will be many, many dozens if
not hundreds of different causes," he said.

MUTATION PRESENT AT BIRTH

Contactin 4 is involved in the development of axons, which are the
long strings that connect one neuron to another. Other disruptions of
this gene are known to cause developmental delay and mental retardation.

The genetic mutation is present at birth, Hatchwell said.

"In each case a father who was reported as normal had the same thing,"
he added.

"This happens in genetics all the time. Often there are cases in which
someone is reported as normal. They pass it on to their child, who has
severe disease."

It could be the fathers had mild Asperger's or some other condition
that was never diagnosed when they were children. Hatchwell noted that
parents today in the United States are far more likely to seek a
diagnosis for autism spectrum disorder in their children than parents
were in past generations.

This is controversial, with some advocates and experts saying autism
and related disorders have become more common in recent years, and
others saying there is no evidence this has occurred.

"My personal view is that it is not becoming more prevalent," said
Hatchwell. "If a parent has a child with some sort of learning
f they get labeled as autism they get all sorts of help at
school," he added.

Hatchwell has helped found a biotechnology company called Population
Diagnostics Inc. to develop DNA based pre-symptomatic and early
detection tests for autism, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, Type 2 diabetes
and other genetic diseases.

In 2004 researchers at Yale University found one child with
developmental delays who had a deleted copy of contactin 4. In
January, they and two other teams linked a gene called contactin
associated protein-like 2 with some cases of autism, and a third team
found a stretch of DNA on chromosome 16 that they said may cause 1
percent of autism cases.

I found this interesting article and would like to share with those parents who have difficulties in breaking their child from thumb sucking.